Shabbat afternoon I left my friends house cutting it a little fine to get to mincha for 8:30pm. I got to shul and the door was closed so I tried the combination I thought was right for the lock but no luck. After about 5 minutes I started waving at the camera and knocking on the door, worried I was going to miss mincha.
I was praying to Hashem, asking Him to let me figure out the right code or for someone to hear/see me from inside the shul, but nothing was happening. It didn’t make sense however, as I knew Hashem wanted me to daven mincha.
And then I had a thought which said to me something like “let go and trust in Hashem” and so I said out loud something like: “fine, I trust in you Hashem, theres nothing I can do, its all in your hands” No sooner had those or similar words left my mouth and I heard definite footsteps coming round the corner. My heart leapt as a few of the congregants walked round the corner!
It turns out I was early and mincha wasn’t until 8:50.
Ofcourse I was filled with joy, ran in the shul and shared my amazing story with these people who had let me in and I was sure Hashem existed.
This was it – the direct miracle I was looking for. But then it dawned on me, could this have been a coincidence? Was it only because I was looking for a miracle and it was on my mind that I found it.
Or could it be such a subtle miracle, surrounded by doubt and the possibility of coincidence, so as to allow me to still have free will.
After all, it was only after I thought “I’ll leave this to Hashem” and stopped trying the code and “I’ll have to trust Hashem” that I heard footsteps from around the corner.
One could say that they were always going to come round the corner and find me there early but its just strange that they should come only after I thought “OK I’ll just trust in Hashem”. Too strange for me to ignore.
