What does Hashem Elokecha ask from you, but to fear Hashem Elokecha and to walk in His ways. (Devorim, Perek Yud, Pasuk Yud Gimmel) “B’Eilon Mamre” (Perek Yud Ches Pasuk Alef). Rashi explains that Hashem went to visit with Avraham on the 3rd day after his Bris Milah, circumcision. Hashem appeared to Avraham in Mamre’s territory because “Shenasan Lo Eizah Al HaMilah”. Mamre was one of three people Avraham had gone to with questions on the Bris Milah. Mamre was the only one who gave him positive information. Rashi uses the word “HaMilah” the circumcision. If Avraham went to talk about his Milah why doesn’t Rashi use the word “Milo,” his circumcision?
The advice that Mamre gave Avraham was that he should follow the words of Hashem with Simcha. The word “HaMilah” is spelled Hey, Mem, Yud, Lamed, Hey. The Mem and Lamed are gematria 70 which is a reference to the 70 names of Hashem. What is left is Hey, Yud, Hey — the word “Haya” and Chazal tell us “Ein Haya Elah Bilashon Simcha”. The word “Haya” is always a reference to Simcha. Mamre’s advice was follow Hashem and do the Milah with Simcha. In this week’s sedra, the Chumash for the first time discusses Shidduchim. From Avraham’s first conversations with Eliezer to Rivka coming to see Yitzchak we can find many lessons that relate to the Shidduch process. The following D’var Torah was said for one of the many vorts, engagement parties, at which Mordechai was asked to speak.
The Gemara says: “Yagatah U’matzasah Tamin”. If someone tells you that he searched and he found you should believe him. It is generally accepted that this is referring to a person’s learning. The question can be asked: why does Chazal use Lashon “Metzia”, a find. If a person searches and searches, he deserves an answer — he does not just find it. When a person is learning, he will search and search to understand the Pshat of what he is learning and when he finally finds his answers, it opens up a whole new world for him. He finds more to the learning then he thought there was. We can say the same thing about the search for a Shidduch. When we set out to search for that right person, we go out with many thoughts and ideas as to what we want. What actually happens is that when we find the “right person” we end up with much more than we thought we were looking for. Sometimes it is not always clear to those around you, that what you have found is a “Metzia”, a find. So Chazal tell us — if someone tells you he searched and he found — believe him.
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