Print This Post Print This Post

Tu B’Av

Written by Anonymous

Tu B’Av; Together Again

If there were to be a list of the least-known Jewish holidays, Tu B’Av might be at the top. Most people remember it when they quickly raise their heads from their arms, hearing that the shaliach tzibbur has skipped tachanun and has gone on to kaddish. This year, Tu B’Av was on Shabbes, so we only missed out tzidkascha in mincha. Yet, the mishna (Ta’anis 26b) lists Tu B’Av as one of our two happiest yamim tovim, alongside with Yom Kippur. Therefore, a week late, we shall discuss the ideas behind the holiday of Tu B’Av.
The end of that same mishna quotes a pasuk from Shir HaShirim to refer to Yom Kippur and Tu B’Av. Within that pasuk, the words ‘the day of his marriage’ refer to mattan torah, which is the day of Yom Kippur, when Bnei Yisrael actually received the luchos (Rashi). The pasuk continues ‘and the day of the simcha of his heart,’ referring to the third beis hamikdash, as the mishna explains. Since Yom Kippur has already been accounted for, this latter part of the pasuk must be referring to Tu B’Av. What does ‘the day of the simcha of his heart’ and the building of the third beis hamikdash have to do with Tu B’Av?
In order to get a better idea of what Tu B’Av is all about, we first need to see what events occurred on this day to cause its simcha. The gemarra (Ta’anis 30b) lists six opinions. Before we quote them, it is necessary to make two introductions.
Firstly, we know that different dates have different qualities. On Pesach we celebrate redemption, Purim is emunah, Tisha B’Av galus. The idea is that the quality of the date did not occur because of the event, but that the date itself carried with it that quality well before the event took place, and helped bring about that event. For example, it is not because Pesach occurred in Nissan that creates Nissan’s quality of freedom, but rather that the month of Nissan itself is integrally linked with the concept of freedom even before the Exodus from Egypt took place. This is best demonstrated by the fact that Lot (Avraham Avinu’s nephew) ate matzos on Pesach (Rashi Bereishis 19;3), even though it was centuries before the Exodus, because the matzos themselves were part of the concept of Nissan – freedom – which is imbued integrally within that month even before our Exodus happened. Therefore, the events which occurred on Tu B’Av are keys in ascertaining the quality of the day, because they are the expressions and reflections of the day’s quality.
Secondly, it is worth noting that it does not seem that there is a dispute in the gemarra as to the quality/nature of the day of Tu B’Av – the argument is about the origin/main event of Tu B’Av. So, if all agree on the quality of the day, and the events of the day reflect the quality of the day, we should expect to see one common theme running throughout the six events that are cited. This is analogous to the five events of Tisha B’Av (and five of 17th Tamuz), which have their own connecting theme. For example, the five events of Tisha B’Av all centre around the theme of destruction – the destruction of the two Batei Hamikdash, of Beitar, of the Temple site, and the destruction of many Jews of that generation (and subsequent) resulting from the sin of the spies. We should expect to find a similarly recurring theme running through the six events of Tu B’Av.
What are these six opinions / events quoted by the gemarra?
1) Shmuel said that it was the day that the tribes of Bnei Yisrael were allowed to marry into each other. Initially, the tribes were not allowed to marry people from other tribes, because that would mess up the inheritance of the Land. For example, if many people from Gad married into Shimon, Shimon’s portion would grow at the expense of Gad. Tu B’Av was the day that the ban was lifted and the tribes could marry into each other freely. 2) Rav Nachman said that Tu B’Av was the day that the tribes were allowed to marry into the tribe of Binyamin. As a result of Binyamin defending the barbaric act of rape committed by the people of Givah, the rest of Bnei Yisrael went to war with the tribe of Binyamin, and eventually won. Following this, the Bnei Yisrael made a communal oath not to allow any of their daughters to marry shevet Binyamin (sefer Shoftim 19-21). Tu B’Av was the day that this oath was lifted. 3) Rav Yochanan said that Tu B’Av was the day that the people stopped dying for the sin of the spies, thirty nine years later. During those years, HaShem did not speak with Moshe Rabeinu in the normal manner of closeness. Tu B’Av was the day that HaShem resumed regular close contact with Moshe. 4) Ula said that Tu B’Av was the day of the removal of the officers of Yeravam, stationed to prevent the people going on aliyah leregel to Yerushalayim. 5) Rav Masneh said that Tu B’Av was the day that we could bury the tens of thousands killed by the Romans in Beitar. 6) Rabbah and Rav Yosef said that from Tu B’Av the nights get longer; we stopped cutting wood for the Beis Hamikdash, and could devote more time to Torah study; there was more time to learn at night.
In order to understand the concurrent theme, we first need to understand one opinion better. What is the simcha of the fifth opinion (Beitar); if anything, it is a symbol of continuous destruction and pain to bury so many people? The simcha of the burial of those of Beitar is that when all seemed lost, and it seemed like HaShem had ‘left us’ and put us in complete galus, He still took care of us and made sure that we could bury the dead. HaShem showed us that He was still there for His children. This sums up the theme of all the above events, and indeed of Tu B’Av itself; getting back together after a period of ‘absence.’ It is a reunion. The third opinion shows a reunion between us and HaShem – that He has finished paying us back for our sin, come closer to us, and resumed contact with Moshe after a period of ‘absence.’ Moreover, the fourth opinion conveys a reunion between the Jewish people and the city of Yerushalayim and the opportunity to fulfil the miztvah of aliyah leregel after a period of absence. And the first two opinions clearly revolve around this theme; the reunion of tribes being allowed to join each other in cross-marriage (it seems intermarriage is the wrong term). Lastly, the sixth opinion is another reunion between us and HaShem – the renewed opportunity to increase the intensity of, and time for Torah study after a summer period of less available time to learn.
This is the connection between Tu B’Av and Tisha B’Av. One may have noticed that two of the six opinions above directly correspond to two of the tragedies of Tisha B’Av – the capture of Beitar and the sin of the spies. Tu B’Av tells us that after a Tisha B’Av where it seems HaShem has thrown us into galus and abandoned us, He is still there to be reunited with. Tu B’Av is the mini reunion between us and HaShem after our Tisha B’Av ‘separation.’
Rav Pinkus would explain that this is the difference between the two phrases of the pasuk ‘the day of his wedding’ and ‘the day of the simcha of his heart.’ A wedding is an exciting beginning, but has its worries. The couple do not know how long the marriage will last, or how happy it will be. ‘The day of the simcha of his heart,’ however, is when the couple have just got back together on happy terms after their first real fight. This is true simcha. The couple have just witnessed that each are willing to work at their relationship even through a fight. This shows real commitment and staying power; it has now been transformed from a honeymoon to a marriage. The same is true between us and HaShem – the gemarra (Yoma 86b) states that one is in a stronger position having sinned and done teshuva than if one did not sin at all; one of the reasons for which is that which we have said- to sin and come back shows genuine commitment and staying power. [One may not sin just because they plan to do teshuva for it; mishna yoma 85b]. This is precisely why Tu B’Av is referred to in the mishna with the phrase in the pasuk ‘the day of the simcha of his heart’ – for Tu B’Av is the getting back together after the fight/period of absence which shows real commitment and staying power. It is also why it is parallel to the third beis hamikdash, the beis hamikdash which lasts forever – it is the one of permanence.
The theme is very practical for us in our period of galus. The mashal would be of a king who threw his son out of the palace and into the woods for bad behaviour. The king, however, would secretly watch over his son from behind the trees, hoping that his behaviour improved and waiting for the day where he could return his son to his real home. So too, does HaShem watch over us even in galus and we await the reunion that Tu B’Av teaches us is possible and forthcoming.

Leave a Comment